Are You Listening When Someone Speaks? A Blog Inspired By Kate Murphy’s You’re Not Listening

Last week, in the mail, I received a book from Celadon Books. An ARC called You’re Not Listening by Kate Murphy, which will be available in January 2020. I have really been getting more in to Non-Fiction, especially in what I like to call the “Self-Help” area. Your girl is working on becoming a better her, before she turns thirty in 2021.


At work, we’re taught to lead the conversation. On social media, we shape our personal narratives. At parties, we talk over one another. So do our politicians. We’re not listening. And no one is listening to us.


I am guilty of not listening. I am a great listener, but sometimes I tune people out and only reply when necessary. I dislike talking on the phone and I just about dislike talking. I am not a people person. People gravitate towards me and once I warm up they are more open and just speak to me freely, not really caring if I am listening or not. I listen and I pay attention, but not always.

I also feel as though I have no one who truly listens to me. Think about it, how many people do you have in your life that truly listens to you? How many people can you call and just vent to? How many people truly listens and understands you; and don’t judge you? I have two people in my life like that and one of them lives out of state and I haven’t seen her in 10 years. This friend and I don’t talk every day, maybe even once a month, but when we talk; we talk for hours. It’s therapeutic, and it helps you mental state when you can talk about what’s bothering and talk to someone who truly cares.

This book also blames social media as a distraction to why we don’t listen the way we should. If someone is trying to talk to us, we don’t fully engage because we are too busy in our phones. I am guilty of this. I profit from both my IG accounts, my blog is growing (thank you), and I get business and collaboration opportunities emailed to me all the time. My phone stay in my hand, even at work. I will have it out at the dinner table, when I’m around my friends, or just because.

This book made me realize how much social media rules the lives of those around me and myself. This book made me realize how much I lack in the listening department and how I don’t speak for people to listen. This is probably the best book I have read all year, ever. I highly, highly recommend this book.

You’re Not Listening: What You’re Missing and Why It Matters now available on Amazon and other book retail sites

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.